Jordan meets Johnny

 So the very lucky and beautiful Jordan got to hang out with Mr. Johnny Depp for a few hours the other day at a party. And as we all know Jordan had to dress the part and let them awesome and huge breasts of hers almost steal the spotlight. You imagine the "woody" Johnny had in his pants from not only looking at them wonders of the world, but also being so close to them. Newly single after 14 years of marriage you know for a damn fact Johnny enjoyed his time with Jordan. Who in the fuck wouldn't?

The rumors are true

Yes ladies the rumor is true, Johnny Depp and his wife of 14 years are calling it quits. That is one long ass time to be married in Hollywood years. The star of many blockbuster movies is moving on. Can you imagine for one minute how hard it would be to be Johnny Depp and be married for that long? I mean come on lets face facts, this man must have pussy begging  for him up to his ears daily. Get in line ladies. maybe you will get your chance. And fellas, Vanessa is not at all bad looking and just think how rich she will be now.

The Deppster

 First off Mr. Johnny we already know that you make, "stupid" money for the movies you are in, everyone in Hollywood makes stupid money. You don't have to brag about it ya know. You have made enough money off the Pirates movies to feed half of the world for years. Your an awesome actor no one can deny that.
Here is what Mr. Johnny had to say about doing photo shoots,
    "Well, you just feel like you’re being raped somehow,” he says (via the NY Post) about photo shoots. “Raped … It feels like a kind of weird — just weird, man." 
That is fucking hilarious honestly. Man you can have any chick in this world you desire. You want to talk about rape, shit id take you for a cool few million. Wouldn't even have to rape, just put your joker suit on for me at least please.